Monday, January 29, 2007

Some what back

I'm some what back. Thank you all so very much for your kind words, its meant alot in this difficult time. This last week and a half has been an emotional roller coaster. My moments of crying are starting to subside a bit. My siblings and I spent last Thursday and Friday cleaning out my dads house. Thurday night sitting in my living room with 1/4 of my parents belongings lying on the floor, thats when it started to hit me, he's gone, there both gone. We're all trying not to blame ourselves, because its not going to do us any good.

I didn't cry this much when my mom died 11 yrs ago, but she was sick and bed ridden for her last couple of months. We had time to get used to the fact that she was going. No one expected my dad to end his life. My brother- inlaw, the one who found my dad isn't doing well. We're all just kind of fucked up right now. I know this has made me stronger. I have contemplated the act myself from time to I've been on the other end of it and would never put anyone through this grief.

We're going to wait till summer to clean out the garage. Then once the house/land gets out of probate it will go up for sale. I spent every Tuesday with my dad, I'm going to be lost tomorrow. I've been distracting myself with cock, mostly Scooby's. Friday the hot redhead is going to pound a load down my throat. And I might be rendezvous'ing next week with a hot furry poz guy and having hot meaningless mansex in a cheap motel, so things are ok.

My Union sent a beautiful floral arrangement. I'm kind of dissapointed with my job. Yes my boss showed up to the memorial service and his boss sent me a card, but the people I clean for in my main building, the people I see everyday, didn't do anything, not even a card. One lady said she was sorry to hear the news the rest acted like nothing happened. My co-workers didn't do anything either. A card would have been enough. I've been here for 17 years, I feel like I deserve at least a card.

But then when my mom died and I was still working on campus the people in that building all signed a card for me. Then when I got back from berevement leave, one of the ladies asked if I had been on vacation......and she had signed the card.

Anyway, thank you all again for the kind thoughts and wishes. I will be ok, like that saying goes, "that what doesn't kill us, makes us stronger".

Update: I did end up recieving a card from my coworkers and one from one of the three dept. that I clean for.

Friday, January 19, 2007


I've been debating whether to post this or not, but I need to take a break for a week or two maybe a month.

My father was a very strong and adamant person. After living through his own mothers stroke and nursing home confinement he vowed that he never wanted to get to the point that he had to go to a nursing home and didn't want to be a burden on us kids.

Yesterday morning he woke with a bad headache and the shakes and all we can guess is that he thought he was having a stroke and he ended up shooting and killing himself in his home. He was 87. He was a very happy person who loved his family and this has been a total shock for all of us. It was a very long day which included me and my nephew and Scooby yesterday evening cleaning up the scene once the police cleared it and confirmed it was a suicide.

Needless to say I'm a mess right now.....but I will be back.

I don't understand why you did it, but I love you dad and will miss you so very much.

Friday, January 12, 2007


I decided to go online and check out the local state University's website and I'll be god damned if they have two full time openings for custodians and one part time call in position. I immediately applied. One of my friends mother works as a custodian there and said I could use her as a reference. YES! I'm sure that the full time positions will go to others that are already in the part time call in pool, but hey maybe I can at least get my foot in the door. This State University also acknowledges same sex unions in there health insurance. double YES!!

I asked my boss today if I could get a copy of my last evaluation. He said I a kind of sad tone. He knows the shit thats going on with the big wig Nazi boss, so I'm sure he knows the reason I want my evaluation. With 16 yrs experience of University cleaning and a great evaluation backing me up, I'd say I have a good chance of getting the fuck outta here.

I'm so fucking hyped.....

Thursday, January 11, 2007

Work rant

Well I had planned to tell another vacation story about my sexual exploits but work is starting to fuck with us again and our Nazi ruler is on the rampage.

I was told before Christmas break that we could no longer borrow our cleaning equipment to take home and use. At first I thought, "Oh well, no biggy". That is until I just found out today that the new rule is just for our department. Any other University employee can borrow "OUR" equipment and take it home and clean their carpets/ floors and furniture, but not us. Now I'm thinking WTF.

The Nazi is also threatening to take away our paid Holiday between Christmas and New Years.

It all started with our fucked up Union and our Union steward. In the past we have had shift differentials, meaning first shift gets base pay and second shift gets like 35 cents more and third shift gets like 1.00 more an hour than base pay. If you work a different shift you get paid the differential for that shift. Our stupid ass Union decided they wanted to change that and that if you normally work say second or third shift you would get that pay when ever you worked and the people who work first shift would get base pay even if they worked second or third.

It sounds totally fucked up to me. Basically first shifters get fucked and thats not fair. But anyway like I said this was the Unions idea. I work off campus so was not informed of any of this till it took effect. Apparently coworkers were asked and most agreed to the changes. Dumb fuckers. When our Union people went in to sign it one guy decided against it. This infuriated the University and they whined that they have gone through too much to just forget about it. So it became effective with out our Union reps fully agreeing. Then the guy that disagreed had to work OT and got screwed out of money since he works first shift. He filed a greivance, yadda yadda yadda.

So the fight ensued and now 0ne by one the Nazi is taking away any benefits he can that is not in our contract. This job wouldn't be so bad if it weren't for the Nazi fucking asshole. I wish I could afford to quit. I do plan on getting together a resume and start looking for another job asap. Some place that doesn't discriminate against gays and doesn't have a mentally abusive person in charge. Is there such a place?

Wednesday, January 03, 2007


I'm slightly hung over today, which normally puts me in bottom mode. Today is no exception. Thanks to "Craigslist" we've been corresponding for the past week with a ex marine with a extremely high sex drive. Apparently he can fuck all day/night and cum multiple times. Tells us he will give us as many loads as we are willing to take. He's been sending hot self pics all week, some of them hot action scenes. He's from here but has been out of town and is getting back today........ Did I mention his arms are covered in tattoo's that connect across his chest.

Details to follow.