Wednesday, June 29, 2005

Warm fuzzies to Jonny

God it was about 10 yrs ago that I met Jonny. He was sitting at the bar of the "Berg" with his friend Jaime, drinking his Southern Comfort and coke and smoken a Virginia Slim. He was a sassy little queen, the kind that makes me a bit uneasy and a little intimidated of. He was a southern belle that called everyone "Missy". I never new of him working, but I think he did cut hair at one time. He grew up in the south to a wealthy family with servants. Jonny would probably be considered "a lady of leisure".

He told me one time that as Luthor was getting ready to go to work he told Jonny, "The house is going to be cleaned today" and Jonny responded back, "Oh great I can't wait to meet them". And then Luthor pointed into the mirror at Jonny and said ,"you already have". Jonny then said, "Oh NO, Missy, I'm NOT cleaning this house".

I started cleaning for them soon after we met. Luthor organized vacation trips on the side so we agreed that I'd clean their house in exchange for a trip down to New Orleans for Southern Decadence . One Southern Decadence we ran into Jonny at a bar on Rampart. He was drunk and probably outta money cuz the first words outta his mouth was, "Hi sweetie, BUY ME A DRINK!". After I bought him a couple of drinks, Scooby and I decided to high tail it outta there since we were on a tight budget and couldn't afford to keep Jonny going on Southern and coke all evening. Before we left Jonny had turned to the man next to him and said, "Buy me a drink! and give me 5 dollars!" and sure enough the man did.

Once when Luthor made Jonny mow the grass, he purposely hit the cement curb and broke the lawn mower so he wouldn't have to mow again. Luthor eventually hired a lawn service. The first lawn service guy they had always mowed the day I cleaned. He either wore boxers or no underware at all cuz his large cock would flop back and forth from one thigh to the other as he walked behind his mower. All the while Jonny and I would run from window to window not wanting to miss a flop.

I'd clean house while Jonny would sit in the living room and smoke his Virginia Slims and watch television. I think I mention before that we found out we were HIV+ around the same time. Jonny could never take the side effects of the medications. He tried them all but nothing worked for him.

One time when we were at a summer outdoor house party someone asked Jonny if he wanted to play volley ball. Jonny responded, "Oh no, Missy, I don't do sports". Then Scooby and I suggested that he could play with a purse with a brick in it, and hit the ball with that. He loved that suggestion.

He would always say, "Warm Fuzzies" when he wanted you to know that he loved ya.

and "Squirt, Squirt, Squirt" when he was talking about sex.

When someone would either invade his space or get in his face he'd yell, "GET OFF MY DRESS, MARY!"

When we first met I was intimidated by Jonny and I didn't think we would be friends. But the few hours we spent every week together chatting while I cleaned their house changed all that.

And I found a friend where I wasn't looking.

Scooby paged me tonight at work to let me know that Jonny died this afternoon. I was suppose to clean house tomorrow, but I just don't think I can do it through my tears. God I wish I could quit crying...

I'm going to be on vacation next week and don't know if I'll be blogging or not. Hope everyone has a nice Independence Day.

Tuesday, June 28, 2005

I totally missed my anniversary date

Hey as of last Saturday I've been blogging for a year. WaaHoo!

A good kinda kidnapped

OMG, I've been so busy. Trying to get ready for our crazy independence day party, which is on Sunday this year. If anybody reading this is going to be in the area and want to come let me know and I'll give you directions. Just trying to get all the decorations up/ stuff that could get stolen, packed away/ shopping for food/ cleaning up the accumulated piles of Scooby's crap that is overflowing everywhere, ect. It's fucking madness, I tell you, MADNESS! We were going to start doing all this shit last weekend, but we kinda got kidnapped by our new friend "K".

Actually "K" isn't really a "new" friend, he worked at the local bar along time ago, then moved away and now is back. He's got a fucking great upbeat personality, which is really what we needed considering most of our friends are manic depressive. Anyway "K" stopped by last weekend and talked us into going over to the Arlington Hotel which is an old straight bar down the street that we've been wanting to check out. It was early afternoon and only the little pub part of the bar was open. We wanted a pitcher of beer, but they only had Milwaukee's Best, we said what the hell. Their draft beer wasn't all that cold so we choked that down and then headed down the street to Steamers another straight bar/restaurant. Had a nice ice cold pitcher of beer with frosted glass's there plus some eye candy. YUM!

Drinky Drinky Happy Happy

After that we headed to ST. Stan's annual Polish Festival. Ogled over all the studly mancandy, ate one of those doughy elephant ear thingys and headed to the beer tent. Drank a couple of pitchers there and watched more hot men polka. Then we finally called it a night and "K" crashed on our couch.

The next morning I made the guys breakfast and then we went out flea marketing. Went to Normans which is kind of a discount store and bought Scooby and I some new swimming trucks and a new pair of sandals. Sometime that afternoon we ended up at Mulligans Pub for another pitcher.

Drinky Drinky Happy Happy

Then the next night we went out to the bar to hand out more invites but didn't plan on staying long. "K" was there so we played some pool and drank some more pitchers. Ended up closing the bar... We ran into some friends that live around the corner from the bar and they invited us over for a few cocktails. We went, had a few more drinks and ended up playing cards till 5:30am. Had a great time...but Ugh.. five fuckin thirty am!

I feel like I drank the world.... and now I have to dry out to get ready for the party this weekend.

On the downside...

I had such a great weekend but I feel bad about it cuz Jonny isn't doing well. The first time I cleaned over at Jonny and Luthor's after Jonny's return/faisco in New Orleans he was in the hospital. Luthor left me a note saying that he'd be home the next day. The next week when I entered the house to clean I noticed the wheel chair and hospital bed sitting in the living room...empty but waiting. I also noticed the Visiting Nurses schedule on the kitchen counter. Jonny was sleeping upstairs as normal but "R" was there sitting with him. The trip must of really taken its toll on him. I'm still shocked and scared at how fast he's declining. After I got done cleaning I told "R" to tell Luthor that if there was anything I could do, to let me know. Then I left and cried on the way home.

Tuesday, June 21, 2005

Yes? No? maybe so...

I mentioned before that I was thinking of changing the name of my blog cuz, well, "From the Banks of the Dirty Titt" was kinda long. So what do ya think?

One of my exboyfriends used to call me "babydaddy" when we were together and when I occasionally see him he still calls me this. So I figured I'd throw it out there and see what ya all think.

Update: I've also been thinking of the name "Blurt" ...Hello I'm Mike and I'm a habitual blurter. Shit flys outta my mouth without my brain having any say at all.

I warned ya that I'm indecisive...but I'm leaning more towards "Blurt".

Monday, June 20, 2005

Serena on Bewitched was the bomb!

I just read 10 tired TV cliches by Larry Carroll and well I think he's wrong on a few of them. I loved Samantha's kooky cousin Serena on Bewitched, Phoebe's bitchy sister Ursula on "Friends"/"Mad about You" ect., and cousin Ophelia on "The Addams family", and so on.

I also liked the characters that you here about but never see: Norm's wife Vera on "Cheers" and Niles wife Maris on "Frasier". I thought it was cute.

And I also like characters that are sassy to their bosses. It makes us working force think ha ha wish I could say that to the boss.

Other wise I agree with the rest of the shit he was ranting about.

I'll tell ya whats tired...Most of reality television shows. The only reason that Hollywood started doing reality television is because the writers went on strike and instead of negotiating with them they came up with these stupid reality shows which needs no writers. But I guess this way they can give alot more people their "fifteen minutes of fame"....Next..... I still feel for the writers, we all gotta make a living.

Granted I work evenings so I don't see much if any evening television. But shows like "The Bachelore/Bachelorette, Who wants to marry a Millionaire" and shit like that doesn't interest me AT ALL. In fact I think I would rather dry heave for an hour than watch shit like that.

Thats all I'm sayin...

weekend review

We went out to the bar after I got out of work Friday night. The parking lot was packed, but when we entered we found that 75% of the people there were lesbians. Being around so many lesbians made me retreat into my shell. Lesbians don't get me, and it seems whatever I say always gets misinterpreted and I end up pissing some one off. So I kept my mouth shut most of the night and chatted with friends on the back patio while Scooby handed out party invites. I must come across as being stuck up, when in fact I'm just freaking out on the inside. I know I'd be better if I'd just take Marinol and Xanax instead of alcohol and smoke, but I like to drink dammit. I'm finding that Marinol really relaxes and motivates me, where its smokable sister taken in large quantities makes me stupid to the point that sometimes its hard for me to put sentences together.

Made the mistake of selling some stuff in Saturdays paper in the freebie adds. The calls started at 6:30am Saturday morning...Ugh..... Did sell my old boxsprings and mattress though. It was gone before Scooby even got outta bed.

Spent Saturday working around the yard. Scrubbed the mold off the brick patio, finally planted some flowers in a few pots, and got my shed reorganized with some cement block and wood shelves. Also got my 1970 Cadillac's tires pumped up, fluids checked and got it started up and running. Really wanted to get it on the road before this, but I'm still waiting for the driveway to be paved before I pull it outta the back yard.

Saturday night was spent having a bon fire and partying with the neighbors in the back yard. They brought over fireworks and beer. We had a might say.

Then Sunday took my dad out for lunch. Took my cemetery pics but I'm not really happy with them, it was just too bright. I guess since the sun hadn't been out in so long it had some catching up to do. I also battled my hangover from the night before.

Then today I pulled weeds in the front yard cuz they were taking over. Then finally applied some new fresh mulch.

Anyway that was my boring little weekend in a nutshell...

Friday, June 17, 2005


No this isn't a review of that old Joan Crawford film. I'm actually talking about the weather. God it seems like its been raining, cloudy and overcast for fifteen million years. It's rained so much lately that the air itself smells moldy and mildewy. I think we might of had some sun a week or so ago, I don't remember. I'm not complaining though, at least we don't have to run the air conditioner. Actually put a blanket back on the bed the other night cuz of the chilliness.

Been trying to put the house together for out annual independence day party. This year it's going to be Sunday the 3rd of July since that's going to be the big finally night. Bay City always has a big 4th of July celebration with 3 nights of fireworks. We live so close that you can view them from the front porch. Scooby and I are planning to go down to the Berg tonight to hand out invites. Hoping to have a good turn out. I bought a bunch of new decorations from Oriental Trading this year. Actually this is the first time I've bought decorations. Through out the years people have brought us decorations but they're starting to get worn so I figured that I might as well splurge and buy some new stuff.

This Sunday is Fathers day. I went to Rite Aid to buy my father a card, man how pathetic that was. They had Fathers day cards from your dog and/or cat, from wife, daughter and ones for grandfathers, but very little variety for a son to give to his father. They had alot of cards for the beer drinking father but nothing the for the crabby, grouchy old man father. I finally found one, but I don't remember what it says now. I threw it in the glove box of my car so I wouldn't loose it.

Scooby and I are going over Sunday to take my dad out for lunch. I'm hoping that the weather gets better by then cuz I wanna stop by the cemetery before we get to dads so Scooby can take a pic of me laying/posing infront of my tombstone. How warped is that!

Tuesday, June 14, 2005

Local man beats girlfriend with bible

Some guy beat his girlfriends face in with a bible back in October in Saginaw, MI. The case is in court now and he's pleading no contest. Apparently the arguement started over letting their child go trick or treating. Now thats fucked up.

The complete story

Monday, June 13, 2005

Microwave etiquette

What is it with office people who insist on blowing their food up in the microwave at work. I always make sure that they have plenty of paper towels to cover their food and have even posted a small note on the microwave saying "To prevent splatters PLEASE cover your food with the provided paper towels". But do you think they do...NO. Yes I am the cleaning person but I don't feel its my job to clean the inside of the microwave. You would think that they would want to be courteous to the next person who is going to use it. But no, they blow their food up and then it continues to get baked on throughout the day.

I made the mistake in my last building of cleaning the microwave and it started getting worse and worse till they were blowing shit up everyfuckinday. Sorry I just don't have the time to scrub the dam thing out on a daily basis.

A couple of weeks ago I open the microwave up and it looked as if someone had either had a diarrhea blowout or projectile vomited into the dam thing. There was brown shit covering the entire inside, it was so fuckin gross.

Signs I'd like to post on the micro but really shouldn't:

1. Your responsible for the mess you make in the microwave.

2. Your mom doesn't work here so if you make a mess... Clean it up!

3. Don't make me use the toilet brush to clean this thing!

If I start cleaning the microwave... what's next...making me wipe their ass's after they take a shit...

Friday, June 10, 2005

This weeks review

Last Saturday we finally moved back out onto the back sunporch after spending the winter living in the dining room. After a week of weather in the 80's we decided it was time. It's so nice to have more living space and not be on top of each other, (other than when doing the nasty that is). After the Sunday morning drama, that afternoon we went to the first of 3 summer antique festivals that Midland has at their fairgrounds. Didn't find anything of interest other than the carnival food. Had an elephant ear and a strawberry slushy type drink. YUM! Gotta love the carnival food..

We were only there for 2 hours when they started closing down due to an upcoming severe storm blowing our way. We grabs some alcohol and went back to a friends place. Just finished my first 40 oz. beer when the winds really picked up and it started downpouring. Thurston got concerned about his portable canvas garage type thingy he has in the back yard covering "The Larry Lee". That's his 1967 Slick Craft 5 seater boat. Anyway we ran over there to see if it blew away. It didn't so we tied it to his boat so we didn't have to worry about it. Then went inside and continued drinking. Finished my second 40 oz. beer and should have quit. But NOoooo I then had a few shots of whisky and after that I blacked out.

Found out the next day that I had a few more shots of whisky and peach schnapps. Scooby drove me home Thurston came over also, since his house was still without power because of the storm. We rarely loose power cuz we are wired up with the draw bridge. When they got me back home I passed out on the floor of the back porch. Scooby and Thurston got me situated on the couch and went off to their own devises. Watching porn and screwing I would guess since I found an ashtray and lube outta place in the bedroom.

The weather was been beautiful other than the sporadic rain storms that make for a humid time afterward. Otherwise it's been in the 80's most of the week and I've been loving it. Spent a few hours with my family picnicking before I had to work today. The picnic ended early because of a thunderstorm. Last night going home we had the best lightning storm. Big ass bolts that looks like they hit ground at every snap. God I love lightening storms and heavy rain storms, thats as long as I don't have to go out in it. The lightening storms that is, the heavy rain storms I like to go out in, in fact would really like to have sex outside in a rain storm sometime.

Anyway thats about all that happened this week. Hope to maybe go out on The Larry Lee this weekend out on Saginaw Bay and maybe go swimming.

Tuesday, June 07, 2005

Sunday Morning Drama Theatre part 2

Things are only getting worse.

I got a hold of Luthor Monday night. He hasn't heard from Jonny and is really worried, I could tell from his voice. Scooby gave him the # to the hospital. Apparently Jonny never made it to the Hotel. Never got his luggage. Lost his wallet which had all his money and phone #'s in it. Got picked up by the cops on a misdemeanor for something and was taken to the hospital to be checked out. Thats when the they called me. The cops dropped the charges, and the hospital put him in a cab and sent him to a shelter. He never showed up to the shelter and hasn't been seen since.

The police told Luthor he couldn't file a missing person report because 1.) he (Luthor that is) is not in New Orleans and 2.) not a relative. So he's getting in touch with Jonny's sister and gonna go from there. God I'm worried sick. I don't fuckin understand why the hospital sent him to a shelter. I fuckin told them what hotel he was staying at.

It's all so fucked up...

UPDATE: After I got off the phone with Luthor, Jonny called him. He finally found/made it to the hotel. Luthor got everthing arranged and he's flying home today.
What a fuckin relief!

Monday, June 06, 2005

Sunday Morning Drama Theatre

Sunday morning around 10am the phone rings.

Me: Hello

Other person: Hello is this Mike ____?

Me: Yes

OP: This is nurse _____ at ______ Hospital in New Orleans, we have a Jonny _____ here do you know him?

Me: Yes, I clean house for them.

(Nurse talks excitedly to possible other nurse)He knows him! He's his house keeper.

Nurse: Would you be able to tell us why he is so disoriented? Your the only person he can remember a name and # for. He doesn't even know where he's staying down here.

Me: Well he's HIV, I can't say for sure but he's possibly in the AIDS stage. He always stays at the Monteleone Hotel on Royal St..

Nurse: HIV, AIDS, Monteleone Hotel..ok We're just trying to get him back home. Do you know if he is here with anyone? Is there anything else you can tell me about his health?

Me: I think he went down by himself. and yes he's been having occasional seizures for about 6 months and he sleeps alot.

Nurse: (surprised) By himself? Seizures for last 6 mo., sleeps alot, ok. Do you know a Luthor _____?

Me: Yes thats his boy friend.

Nurse: Where is he at? Do you have his cell phone #?

Me: He's in Chicago this weekend, they took separate vacations, and no I don't have a cell phone # for him. I don't even know were he's staying in Chicago.

Nurse:(surprised) separate vacations?

Me: Yes. We have the same HIV/AIDS case worker you might be able to contact him, his name and # is ______. He might have Luthor's cell #.

Nurse: (Happy, excited)A case worker! Oh your just full of information. Thank you so much. Does he have any family?

Me: Yes, I think his parents live in (southern state).

(in background) Nurse asking Jonny, "Do your parents live in _____. Jonny responding.
Nurse: Ok we have a town and state for his parents. Thank you so much. If we hit dead ends with these leads, I'll be calling you back.

Me: ok

I immediately started calling around trying to find anyone with Luthors #. No such luck. The whole ordeal made me want to cry. I only see Jonny once a week when I go over to clean and lately he sleeps the whole time I'm there. When he is awake he's normally in a really agitated mood. Last year when they went to New Orleans Jonny ended up not leaving his hotel room because his legs wouldn't work. I can't believe he went down there by himself. Jonny and I found out about our HIV status around the same time. Unfortunately the hiv meds have never worked for him and he's been slowly deteriorating every since.

I'm mad and sad about the whole thing. Today I called Luthor and Jonny's house and got the machine and left a message to see if they made it home ok. I also got a hold of our case worker and he hadn't been contacted by anyone. I don't know what's going on and it's driving me crazy. I hope Jonny is ok.

I've been noticing with myself that I've had problems with my own memory lately. And I've gotten lost once driving a route that I've taken a million times. Not to mention that I recently took a newspaper quiz about altziemers and I answered yes to every question. So this is really hitting me. I made Scooby promise that he'd never let me travel by myself if I get as bad as Jonny.

Saturday, June 04, 2005

State Lanes Bowling Alley

State Lanes, Saginaw, MI Posted by Hello

I drive by the State Lanes bowling alley every Thursday and finally took a pic of their sign. Don't know much about the place, just thought the sign was cool.

Dawn Donuts

Dawn Donuts, Saginaw, MI Posted by Hello

Here's a pic of an old local donut shop Dawn Donuts. When I was a kid this was the place to get donuts. There were several locations in the tri-city area but I believe there are only two or three left. Slowly being pushed aside by "Dunkin Donuts" but Dunkin is going to have a run for their money cuz I hear we might be getting a "Krispy Kreme". Nothing beats the Dawn Donuts sign though, I loved the little baker dude. They don't make classic signs like this anymore.

Friday, June 03, 2005

Where the wild things are

Got to work today and decided to go out and pick up trash around my building and look for the kitty that's been hanging around outside. I first saw her a few weeks ago, very friendly for a stray, came right up to me and demanded to have her head scratched. I of course complied and gave her a full kitty massage, which she loved. Then she disappeared and didn't see her again till last night. She was a little bit bigger and when I was petting her I notice that she must be pregnate now since her nipples were getting huge. I couldn't find anything to feed her, but I did give her some water. I did end up breaking up a cookie for her but she wasn't interested in that. All she wanted was her head scratched again, and again I complied. Today I brought a can of cat food with me, just hope she comes back again.

Anyway while I was walking around the building picking up trash. I noticed that the people that live behind our building were out in the front yard feeding one of the wild turkeys that are in the area. I look a little closer and notice that there is another one sitting ontop of their minivan. Since the one chased me last month I decided not to get to close and just go about my business picking up trash.

Just a little while ago I went out to the dumpster to throw the days trash away and got almost all the way out there when I noticed one of the turkeys sitting on the split rail fence near the dumpster. I immediately remembered the one that chased me last month and got a little scared. But then I figured if the neighbors were feeding them then these turkeys are probably not as aggressive as the one I encountered last month. So I continued on and just as I went to lift the lid up on the dumpster to throw the trash away I noticed the other turkey sitting on the fence right behind the dumpster. I quickly threw the trash away and headed back to the building. All the while being constantly watched by the large birds.

I think I said last time that I need to start carrying my camera with me. I have been taking it with me more lately, just not to work. I need to do that. There's been so many times that I told myself, "I need to take a picture of that". But then I procrastinate and the cool thing that I want to take a picture of (normally an old building or a wind mill or something) gets torn down and I miss my chance. This last week though I've taken a couple of pictures of old business signs that I think are really cool. I'll try and post them this weekend.