The crush

It was Mardi Gras weekend at the campground, my other half was shit faced drunk, falling off the picnic table before the parade even started. I finally got him in the tent to sleep it off and went to join the festivities. I sampled several of the cocktails and snacks and ended up at the foam party on the dance floor. I used to love to dance but when your bf of 13 yrs doesn't dance, well it kind of falls to the wayside. That night I dance my ass off, shirtless and slick with foam. I was laughing and having the best time, when it happened, this young handsome twink grabbed my nipple and tweaked it, a little to hard since they are very hypersensitive, then winked at me and continued on. He stuck in my head.

Cut to last month

I found him on Manhunt and he lives in the area, early twenties, vers, top.... He actually hit me up and we exchanged a few emails. I told him right up front my status expecting him to disappear, never to hear from him again, like most of the online guys do. I was wrong, he was cool with it. We had lunch, he told me that he had recently heard from the health dept that someone he had been with tested poz and he was waiting for his results. We went back to his place and had HOT protected safe sex. He's got a smokin hot tight little body and well... he's bigger then me. A few days later his results came back and it wasn't good. He's handling it extremely well, and we've gotten together a second time. This time I discovered how versatile he really is.

So anyway that is what his going on in my life. I have a crush and I really don't know what to do about it. Probably nothing, people come and go and if and when this ends I will be crushed that's why its called a crush. I'm having fun, he is giving me a well deserved boost to my ego and self esteem considering he's twenty yrs younger then me.

Luckily Scooby has cut back on his drinking drastically or else this would be a no brainer. We are still bickering about his lack of employment. I told him he either needs to apply for disability or go back to work full time. He wined that filling out the application for SSD would be so stressful and I told him, "Like the stress I've been dealing with for 12yrs wondering if we are going to financially make it on my paycheck alone, join the club." That shut him up and will hopefully get him to apply. otherwise I'm going to have to tell him that he has 3 choices, A. apply for SSD, B. go back to work, or C. move into the other house. I would never leave him high and dry, I do love him but not enough to financially support him for another 12 or more yrs.. I've got to start taking care of myself and find my own happiness.

Lets end on a lighter note: This guy was born in another state but him and his mom ended up in the town I'm from and I'm dying to ask how they ended up there. If he says his mom is from there I'm gonna shit, since we are about the same age I might know her. Yikes!!

More to come....