Friday, November 25, 2005

Pre Turkey Day stuffing and Holiday recap

Ok so Wednesday night at work I start to get a cold sore. Fuckin Great. Luckily I always carry L-Lysine with me so I start to overdose on that to kick Mr. Cold Sore in the ass and kill him before he becomes Mt. St. Helens. I get home and have a few beers and decide what the hell lets try to get cleaned up so Scooby can fuck my hungry ass. (note: getting "cleaned up" lately has been a real challenge, after the second bottle of water and the toys are still coming out with a chocolate dollop on the end it's just time to give up) Amazingly enough I got my kitty clean, Praise Jeebus. So needless to say Wednesday night I got my ass reemed but good. Have decided that doggie style is my best position since I can drink a beer, smoke a cigar, and hit on the poppers at will. We ended up fucking till about 2:30am, I considered calling in a fuck bud to join, but decided it was a little to late to be calling.

Scooby woke me up the next morning at 7fucking:30am wanting more of my ass, but I just couldn't do it. First of all 10 hrs of work and then only 5 hrs. of sleep = one cranky bitch. Second, he packed me with enough air the night before that I felt like Violet Beauregard as she was turning into the blueberry. I didn't dare fart in bed without blowing the bf's load from the night before all over the sheets. It was time to feed the cat so I got up did that and then tried to get rid of all the air in the lines.

Turned on the TV, only to hear the "Today" show predict a foot of snow for Michigan for the day. FUCK!

"So if there's no place to go...Let it snow, Let it snow, let it snow."

Well I do have someplace to go...SO STOP FUCKING SNOWING!
Still not feeling all that great I went back to bed and let Scooby at least fuck my ass crack till he filled it with his hot man goo. We then got up and started watching the Macy's Thankgiving Day Parade which always makes me a little nostalgic. The first thing I saw was a bunch of kids singing with a choreographed number and all. They were great until I listened to the words of their song. "I'm thankful for my cell phone", "I'm thankful for my computer password" blah blah blah.....WTF Welcome to the United States of Shallowness and Greed. Who ever wrote that song should be slapped right out of their Dolce & Gabbana's. The rest of the parade was cool though so I regress. Luckily the snow stopped and we were able to trek the 30 miles to my sisters place for dinner.

So now I sit drinking my Irish creme and coffee and am getting ready to veg infront of the TV. Anyway Happy Black Friday to all you shopaholics.


AJ said...

It sounds as if you had a GREAT Thanksgiving. That is my favorite position also. I used to think I was a freak and that I would join a circus some day, but then I found the true gift of having my third arm: poppers, beer, cig... What is better? Nothing!

DAIGLE said...

LOL You have inspired me. I feel it to be my duty as the official snugfitbottom of the world to help those bottoms in need.

I will be sure to make entries about "Blowdown ™"-Getting rid of excess air before, during and after sex.

All I needed was a spark and my flammable ass is on fire now.


Homer said...

Sounds like you got more stuffing than the turkey!

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